Sunday, 28 May 2017

Slowly Getting Back ...

Have you ever gone through a phase where you have no idea of who you are, where you are or what's happening?

That's me at the moment -things have been so chaotic, so mentally draining since last August. During the past week I think things have finally turned a corner.

The cancer spectre will always be hanging over the family, ready to attack if we're not careful.

But all the other terrible things have appeared to either be resolved or finally come to an end. It's unbelievable how many horrid things have happened in such a short period of time. But we've survived - somehow.

I'm drained.

My family always rely on me to be the strong one and I try hard to keep them happy and take away as much pain and worry as I can but it has it's effects.

I want to curl up in a ball and howl. I want to feel someone's arms around me, holding me tight and telling me everything will be okay. Of course none of that will happen.

I'll do my usual reaction of taking a deep breath and pretending I'm fine. It helps to not have anyone around except the kids. They have no idea.....lol.

Anyway, I've immersed myself in writing - written over 80,000 words this month. It's a great way to deal with the pain, the loneliness. I write myself a sexy handsome hero for my make believe world .... hahaha.

So finally I'm slowly getting back to the land of the living.

As well I've vegged out on a couple of series - Sherlock with Martin Freeman. Now that's good. But even better was the first and second series of The Tunnel- the French/English production.

Fabulous acting and great scripts as good as Broadchurch.

It helps to numb the pain by mindlessly watching episode after episode.

The only high spot is my latest book is out and it's reached my publisher's best selling top 5!

Whoohoo!

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